My Favorite Album: "Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge"

It's so hard sometimes to pick a favorite album; that is, until you find that one album that you can't forget. I've been reminiscing on different music from my teenage years for the past week, and it really got me to thinking about the album that started the love for it all: My Chemical Romance's "Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge".

Growing up, I listened to all kinds of music. Living in Philadelphia, I grew up on salsa and bachata that I heard at my Uela's or my Titi's house whenever I would go over there. Even hearing Latin music now gives me flashes of my childhood-going around the corner to a house that was handing out juice boxes and cheese danishes to all of the kids on the block; driving in the car with my Uela yelling at the other drivers; and the heat of the hot city pavements. When I was 4 and my mom and I moved to Wildwood, it was all about country music and classic 20's, 30's and 40's; a strange mix, but a result of living with my mom and my Nana (my great grandmother). I got into R&B and hip hop when I was around 12; I was still caught up in the pop phase of Backstreet Boys and NSync, and I listened to a little bit of Matchbox Twenty and some other light rock. But for some reason, no one artist or album really struck a chord with me until the Spring of 2005.

I was going to a performing arts school and still trying to figure out my "musical identity". My natural singing voice was deep for a girl, and the only time I sung higher was when singing soprano notes in choir. I couldn't belt. I had a hard time singing songs by female pop singers. I couldn't sing R&B. In addition to this, I was going through the normal teenage struggles: I had a boyfriend who I was always arguing with; I had schoolwork that was never finished; and I knew for sure that I was going to fail algebra and have to come up with 200 bucks for summer school. I also lost my after-school job at a deli mid way through the school year, so I was basically frustrated and angry all year. I was frustrated with the world and everyone in it. And my only escape, singing, was turning into a chore because of my lack of ability to identify any kind of music that I could sing well and that touched me enough to want to sing it. And then "Helena" came out.

I had seen the video for "I'm Not Okay (I Promise)" a few months before on MTV, and I knew who My Chemical Romance were. I would hum "I'm Not Okay" and we talked about how funny the video was. But one day, as I was brushing my teeth for school, I saw a flash of red, white and black and heard a bass line that caught my attention. I stared at the TV in wonder, watching Gerard Way in a black suit and red tie perform with dancers-dancers!-in black suits and dresses, doing the most emotive dances every. The coloring of the video was unique, the ballet section incredible. And the song was a monster. Coming in like a train in the distance with a distinctive bass line and Gerard's raspy voice somewhere between a whisper and a haunting lower register, then grabbing your full attention with Frank and Ray's guitars and an unrelenting drum line. The bridge was suspenseful-if you could ever imagine a section of a song to be suspenseful-and the ending to the song slammed to a close, leaving you wanting more even after the last stray guitar chords dropped off. I wanted to hear more.

I borrowed the CD from a friend (I can't remember which) and immediately burned myself a copy. I brought it to school in my CD player every day, listening to it on a loop throughout any breaks in classes I had, on my way home on the NJ Transit, and sometimes even in class.

"Helena" was just the first song on the album. The second track "Give 'Em Hell, Kid" had an even more unrelenting bass guitar line and lyrics that spawned merchandise and a nickname for the MCR fan base: The NJ Murder Scene. "To The End " begins with Gerard Way over one strong guitar that sounds like the epitome of rock and roll electric guitar riffs. As he whispers the fourth line of the song, then swoops into the next line ("Let's go down"), the second guitar chimes in with a dizzying guitar loop that sets the pace for the rest of the song, which doesn't slow down until it screeches to a halt. On one of my three personal favorites, "You Know What They Do to Guys Like Us in Prison", the band quiets down a bit, letting Gerard's Freddie Mercury-esque vocals take the spotlight. Guest singer Bert McCracken, from the Used, adds a giddy dynamic that escalates the songs status from simply a theatrical rock song to something unique, something that's both smooth and honest and mental-asylum insane at the same time. There's endless standouts on the album. "I'm Not Okay" is a frenetic pop-punk song that cements the band's true identity. "The Ghost of You" is a haunting ballad about lovers and war that will make you choke up and stick in your memory for a long time. "Thank You For The Venom" is a screaming, stomping anthem for the early 2000's pop-punk movement, and gave My Chem fans another tag line: "Hallelujah, lock and load". " The closer (and rounding out my three favorites), "I Never Told You What I Do For A Living" grabs you with the opening 30 seconds and doesn't let you go, taking you on a hard rocking, shouting story that doesn't sound like anything else in the music scene circa 2005. Quite simply, there was nothing like My Chemical Romance. There was nothing like aggressive rock, punk rock, hard rock, pop punk-rock music was mine. It was for me. It was what I connected with. And ever since then, I have been a die hard My Chemical Romance fan. Every song on that album defined my sophomore and junior year of high school and helped me make it through into the next year feeling a little bit better about who I was. I loved rock and roll. It shaped me as a person, helped me find my identity, and became therapeutic as the years went on. Rock music is still my favorite kind, and I can't wait until my next mosh pit. And it's all because five guys from Jersey said "f*** the system" and made the music that they wanted to make, leading the pop-punk movement and creating a new culture of rock fans.

My Chemical Romance will always be my favorite band because they define the misfits, the socially awkward, the people who think outside the box. And that's something that we need a little bit more in life. "Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge" is a fantastic album that truly embodies everything that the new wave of unrelenting alt-punk-rock is all about.

My Take and Feelings On the Chick-Fil-A Controversy

I read two things today that struck me about this whole Chick Fil A controversy.

The first was an anonymous blog post by a gay Chick Fil A employee that I found on Google. You can read the full length post here.

Honestly, it broke my heart and frustrated me. It's posts like these, in times like right now, amid the peak of Chick Fil A's long-running public persona as a stauntly religious, anti-gay company, that bother me more than anything. More than Dan Cathy going on a radio program and finally solidifying his stance on gay marriage. More than Chick Fil A giving their customers money to organizations that move to suppress gay rights, rather than donating to say, local churches and homeless shelters that may need it more or charities that work to send missionaries to less fortunate countries, such as Africa and Guam. Posts like the one above bother me because of one simple fact: it underscores the seemingly unending culture of hatred that, apparently, is the backdrop of America. Welcome to the "Free World", indeed.

Being an openly gay adult is basically like being the new kid in grade school: you introduce yourself and everyone is quite polite and friendly to you, exchanging pleasantries and asking questions until you both let your guards down a bit. But then, you screw up. You say something about yourself that you didn't think would matter, because it's just a part of you. When you were in grade school, it might have been "I really love playing Dungeons and Dragons!" But now, it's "I'm openly gay". And suddenly, the person you're talking to shifts. It can go one of two ways. The first way is this: "Oh, that's cool," and maybe, if you're lucky, "Oh, I am too". The second way is this: "Oh." This second way is followed by anything ranging from alienation, to disgust, to pompousness, to, unfortunately, insults.

A person's feelings should not be considered only if they're straight. A person's feelings and beliefs should be considered regardless of who or what they are. Isn't that what this country is supposed to be all about? Who are we to say things like the employees in the above article, who unfortunately said that "Gays should starve" and praised the support for Dan Cathy that was shown when customers came in and spouted their hatred towards everyone in earshot? If a black man was a manager at a clothing store, and an employee said to a fellow employee, "I don't understand why they hired a nigger as a manager", I'm positive that he would be tattled on by someone in earshot and swiftly fired. If someone came into a Denny's where the kitchen staff was mostly Hispanic and said, "I support your company because you keep those immigrants in the back where they belong", I'm positive that they would be reprimanded by the acting manager or even a staff member before they continued ordering their breakfast. So why is this not the same for gays who just happen to work around straight staff members? Why is no one coming to their defense in the workplace? Why are customers not thinking about the feelings that they're hurting when they're spouting such hate? It feels to me that the answer to these questions is purely fear and ignorance: fear of the repercussions of standing up for how you really feel, instead of the beliefs that you were raised with, and the ignorance to blindly follow where everyone else is going simply because you refuse to educate yourself; fear of change and accepting people's differences, and the ignorance to again, refuse to educate yourself about gays and why they truly are gay. Fun fact: many of my friends have told me themselves that they did not choose to be gay. Because trust me, being straight would be much easier. I bet you weren't thinking of that when you were saying "I'm so glad you don't support the queers, now I can eat in peace" to that gay employee who waited on you, made your food, and took your money , all the while knowing that said money was going towards suppressing his rights, were you?

Furthermore, are we not in the 21st century now? Because I'm sincerely wondering when we decided to transport back to the 1920's. I'm not comparing the anti-gay movement to racism and segregation; racism may be mostly eradicated, but it is unfortunately something that will always be passed down and contested among the population and will be an undercurrent for centuries due to generations and generations of unchanging beliefs among the ignorant (again, welcome to the "free world"). I'm comparing it to something even more ridiculous, or that at least seems ridiculous now: the oppression of women. Remember when women couldn't vote? Remember when women could not go to school? Remember when women were married when they were 15 years old and were only allowed to stay at home with the children, not hold a job? Hell, remember when women couldn't wear pants? Yes, that does seem ridiculous now, doesn't it? But it happened. And after all of that oppression, after all of that fighting, all of the trailblazers that had to speak out and march to change society's perception of women, the 19th amendment was passed. And a century later, with stay-at-home dads becoming just as normal as stay-at-home moms and 2 percent more working women holding college degrees than men, it's ludicrous to even think about a time when women were oppressed. So why, when we have so much history showing that oppressing minorities of people simply doesn't work out, do we feel the need to go through the rigamorole of oppressing a group of people who simply want to love? LGBTs don't want to make you LGBT. They just want to have the same rights as straight people. And really, we're all God's people after all. Doesn't it seem a bit ridiculous that we're still rallying against gays when they've waited patiently for decades for the government to make a change, and are only now speaking out? And doing it through peaceful protest, I might add, in the form of a "Kiss In" at Chick-Fil-A on August 3 (which is tomorrow-looking forward to the pictures from that). I don't see the Westboro Baptist Church performing a peaceful protest any time soon.

For all of you who are pointing to your bibles and pulling out the old standbys of 1 Corinthians 6:9-10, Leviticus 18:22, Leviticus 20:13, and your verses about sodomites, remember a couple of things:

-The translation of 1 Corinthians 6:9-10 has been hotly debated for years, due to the use of the Greek word "arsenokoite" in the original Greek scripture. The two root words are the same terms often used to refer to any premarital/extramarital sex, not just homosexual sex. When the Bible was translated, there was a margin of human error, regardless of the fact that Jesus spoke to the original disciples and had them write His word directly from his lips. Even with divine scriptures, we need to allow for human error.

-Sodom and Gemorrah were burned down for more than homosexuality. Sodom and Gemorrah were cities that were destroyed because of the crimes going on-the pedophilia, the rape, the excess. Homosexuality was looped in with those sins somewhere along the way, and sodomy suddenly became an acceptably interchangeable term for-well, you know. But that's just it: much of the aura surrounding Sodom and Gemorrah is because the names of the cities, due to the judgement that was brought upon them, have become synonomous with excess and crime, and therefore are technically just references ("slang terms", if you will) that have been passed down and twisted through the ages. 

-Most importantly: what is the verse that all of us true, born-again Christians know by heart? The very first verse you learn at your very first Sunday School class? John 3:16: "For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten son, that whosoever believeth in Him, should not perish, but have everlasting life". It doesn't say "For God so loved the world, excluding those who lie with mankind as womankind". It says "For God so loved the world". If we are to truly stand by this verse, the verse that we quote from the time we are children, the verse of redemption and hope, then we are to also believe that God really meant it when he said "whosoever believeth in Him". That means everyone. Even the LGBT community. We write it on paper crosses, we quote in in church, we've made a damn sing a long in a round to this verse-it's time for us to truly pay attention to it, listen to it, and believe in it.

And by the way, here's a sidenote for my LGBTs that are reading this: Not all of us Christians are the same. Not all of us are like Billy Graham. And it does hurt our feelings when you call us crazy religious whack-job bible thumpers, because there are those of us who are behind you, 100 percent. The reason why you can't see us is because the negative voices are, unfortunately, always the ones who speak the loudest.

The second thing I read today that struck me, and may seem silly to you, is a simple Facebook status by a close friend from high school. It stated the following:

"Why is everyone flipping shit about Chick-fil-a now? Seriously, their stance on gay marriage and lifestyle is nothing new guys. I'm not complaining about the recent press their opinion has got, but it's a little comical when last year I've refused to eat at CFA once I learned about their position and support of suppressing gay rights and when I told my friends about this they were like "But dude, the food!"

Lol, look at you now kid."

What followed was a series of statements from the most reasonable voice in this argument that I've seen yet:

"I wouldn't have had beef with them if it were just saying "Rar, we don't like Gays" and I would probably be like "Psh, whatever, you're lame, give me waffle fries and a milkshake."

But when my money is also being used to go towards anti-gay groups, it'll be like loading a bullet into the chamber and then Chick-Fil-A using the gun."

"I know they hire gays too, here's the thing.


If I knew someone who gambled on dog fights, I'd have a problem hanging out with them. That person would be supporting them.


If I knew someone who openly said "I give money to make sure Black people and Women can't vote in next years election" I'd have a problem with them.


Chick-Fil-A has been giving revenue to anti-gay groups, something I don't support. I have a problem with that."

"...this information has been available for a long time. I've told my friends and tried to show them and they were like "psh, it's just food." and now I see all this "ZOMG, THEY HATE GAYS" and it's funny. It's like, where were you when it was just two or three people not eating at Chick-Fil-A?"

The point that I'm making by posting these is this: Chick Fil A's stance is nothing new. Dan Cathy isn't going to retract his statements and beliefs anytime soon (and if he says he does, he's lying for the sake of business). Religious statements don't belong in business. Religion is religion, just like politics are politics. They are hot topics that don't belong in that arena. What people should really think about, outside of the current controversy that is going on, are the things that they truly believe in. Do you really feel that Dan Cathy is right in voicing his opinion on gay marriage and donating company funds to anti-gay organizations? Then by all means, enjoy your chicken nuggets. But if you really, truly don't want to support Chick Fil A, just don't buy from them. Chick Fil A is a restaurant that has been around for decades, and it won't be going away any time soon or-I'm sure-making any other religious statements any time soon. Chick Fil A will always be Chick Fil A-delicious food, served by people who just need a job, and run by a man with core values that date back through centuries of ancestors. If we just ignore Chick Fil A and stop buying from them from now on (and I mean really stop buying-no cheating with a Georgia Peach milkshake, not even in July) then maybe all of this mess will be worth something. Maybe this ugly controversy can turn into something good: an opportunity for those who were not previously aware of the values Chick Fil A has had since their inception to refuse to buy and effectively shut down some stores, one by one. At the very least, enough people boycotting will make a little dent in Dan Cathy's pocket. And if it doesn't, then at least our conscience is clear because we know where are money is not going. Forget about the haters and naysayers and protesters, because they will get their comeuppence. Just focus on keeping your own conscience clear, and only good things can come of it. Let's focus on taking those two or three people that have not been eating at Chick Fil A and turning that number in hundreds and thousands. It's just another form of peaceful protest-and if it worked for some of history's greatest leaders, then it can work for us.

As a side note, I'd like to take a random moment and thank two of the people that were instrumental in changing my mind on this subject as a teenager: my friends Jeremiah and Natalie. Going to chARTer-Tech opened my mind, but you guys were the two that really kicked it off, and I'm not sure you were aware of that. I'll always love you two for that, and will always be grateful for our friendship, no matter how many miles apart we are.